Messays

2021 December – Week 52

We’ve arrived. I’m not one hundred percent sure how we got here, but we’re here…

While my brother was in town, we had a conversation about all manner of things— life, choices, the state of the world…

Steven is very much like my dad in that he’s far more inherently pessimistic than my mom and I are. He doesn’t think of himself as a pessimist, though. He calls himself a realist. In his words: “It’s just that I see things the way they actually are, and unfortunately the way things actually are is fucked.”

I get it. Because while I wouldn’t say I’m an optimist exactly (I don’t necessarily think everything is going to work out, I just have hope it will), I do tend to remain mostly positive (the glass may not be full, but there’s enough to drink). This year, though, has really tested my capacity for looking on the goddamn bright side. In my words to my brother: “It has been really hard to be an optimist this year.”

So it is with relief that I usher in 2022. But also with hope. Hope that the world will start to right itself and that humans get their shit together… Hope that friends and loved ones find peace and happiness and adventure. Hope that 2022 will surprise me in good ways and, of course, hope that I’ll surprise myself in good ways, too.

Sunday

12/26/2021

Despite it being a difficult year, it did have its moments, and I made most of them myself. I like that about me. I’m not a passive character. I get out there and do.

But sometimes I sit at home and watch movies with Aung. Because that’s doing something, too. It’s spending time with someone I care about— someone I want to make sure is a part of the beginning and end of my year.

Monday

12/27/2021

I was happy to spend some time relaxing with my family over the break, too. I think we all needed the down time. Sometimes family time can be… a lot. But this time it was a lot of puppy pets and cuddles (with dogs that aren’t supposed to be on beds), and I can get on board with that real quick.

Tuesday

12/28/2021

I love when I get to spend a little time with Dexter (or Puxter, as I call him), my brother’s dog. And he gets excited to see me, too! So excited, in fact, that he must take my boot and do a few laps around the kitchen with it.

Wednesday

12/29/2021

Oh look, another picture of a dog. Here’s Bailey Boo enjoying her Christmas present.

Thursday

12/30/2021

Oops. Another dog. This is Joannie’s daughter-in-law’s pup.

Joannie invited the Hot Pockets (our morning writing group) over to do vision boards. I’m not really one for a vision board, but I figured I’d go anyway. Why not?

That’s another thing I like about myself— generally, my life philosophy is to say yes. I’ve found that saying yes to invites, aside from being an easy way to bring the people in my life a little happiness, has led to a fuller life. After all, existence is nothing but a series of small experiences, one after another, lining up to be your lifetime. So I say yes. Not to things I don’t want to do, obviously, but if I’m indifferent about the thing (like vision boards), or hesitant because I’m unsure or self-conscious or afraid, I generally just say yes anyway. And the result tends to be a lot of laughs or, at the very least, a good story to tell.

My life is good and bad, sure, but rarely ever boring.

Friday

12/31/2021

Speaking of saying yes to random things, when Liv wanted to spend the last minutes of 2021 creating TikTok videos in our sweatpants doing ridiculous dances neither Adam nor I could really do, I said, “Why not?”

And it was a blast. Who wouldn’t want to spend the last few minutes and the first few minutes of the year dancing?

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